Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Them Crazy Veeps: 11-10

The Veeps are ranked and ready to go. Starting at the middle, as the green numbers get lower, the guys get better, but as the red numbers go down, we get into some crazy-ass mother-fuckers. (7 of 12)

#11 - Gerald Rudolph Ford (House Minority Leader, Republican-MI) 1973-1974 (ascended) Pres: Nixon

The first VP appointed under the 25th Amendment, Ford came in under the unanimous insistence of the House. He barely had enough time to do anything in the office, as Nixon would resign only a few months later. He wasn't the best president, but if we're ranking ability to readily take over the presidency he gets a lot of credit.

#10 - Garret Augustus Hobart (Industrialist, Republican-NJ) 1897-1899 (died) Pres: McKinley

It's hard to imagine now, but before Hobart, presidents didn't really turn to their VPs for advice. Hobart was so powerful and influential, people called him, "Assistant to the President." I'd rank him higher, except he died before the end of his term.

#11 - Richard Mentor Johnson (Representative, Democrat-KY) 1837-1841 (1 full term) Pres: Van Buren

Not only did Johnson have an affair with a slave, he wouldn't shut up about it. He even called her his common-law wife. He only ended up on the ticket because everyone believed he killed Tecumseh at the Battle of Tippicanoe, and that made him super popular. Van Buren didn't even want him. When the Panic of 1837  hit, he did what any responsible VP would do. He left Washington to open a tavern/spa. Van Buren was so pissed that in 1840, he just ran without a running mate.

#10 - Richard Bruce Cheney (Businessman, Republican-WY) 2001-2009 (2 full terms) Pres: G. W. Bush

If pressed, I'd say the only good Cheney accomplished was being so fucking insane, no one would dare assassinate or impeach the president. He was pro-war and pro-torture, and he used his influence over a weak-minded president to get his agenda accomplished. He exacted revenge on his enemies' wives, and he shot his own friend in the face. Oh yeah, and he almost died a couple of times. My God, can you imagine if he'd become president?

Coming Up - Which VP was inaugurated in another country?

Later - How many Vice Presidents went on to support the Confederacy?

(Click here to view the whole list so far)

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