Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Them Crazy Veeps: 7-6

The Veeps are ranked and ready to go. Starting at the middle, as the green numbers get lower, the guys get better, but as the red numbers go down, we get into some crazy-ass mother-fuckers. (9 of 12)

#7 - John Adams (Ambassador, Federalist-MA) 1789-1797 (2 full terms) Pres: Washington

If after his years of public service, John Adams somehow ended up in hell, the devil would most likely make him be Vice President for all eternity. Adams was a man of action, and in 1789, no government office was more ineffectual than his. Washington kept him out of most cabinet meetings, and after he suggested we call the president "His Excellency," the Senate took away his talking privileges. Maybe if they'd let him speak, he wouldn't have had to cast a still unbroken record 29 tie-breaking votes. Still, he gets a lot of points for doing the job extremely well. He supported his president and managed to hold onto enough popularity and power to win the presidency.

#6 - George Mifflin Dallas (Senator, Democrat-PA) 1845-1849 (1 full term) Pres: Polk

Dallas may have been the first VP to actively use the office specifically as part of a plan to be elected president. Since President Polk promised never to run for re-election, his path seemed clear. He sought to use his limited role as presiding officer of the Senate to its fullest. Jumping head first into debates, he made his presense known and saw his tie-breaking vote as his equivalent of the president's veto. In 1846, Dallas cast the tie-breaking vote to reduce tariffs, siding with the president but against his own beliefs and the traditions of his home state. In that moment, his presidential hopes were over. He left his position to a standing ovation in the Senate chamber.

#7 - Daniel D Tompkins (Governor, Democratic-Republican-NY) 1817-1825 (2 full terms) Pres: Monroe

As Governor during the War of 1812, Tompkins got himself into a ton of debt trying to raise funds to defend his state. When the creditors came for him, they didn't much care that the government owed him their $90,000 that he owed them. He spent much of his time as VP in litigation. The stress finally got to him, and he spent a good portion of his term piss drunk. According to many reports, he presided over the Senate, sloppily wasted. He was re-elected with Monroe in 1820, the last VP to survive re-election until 1916.

#6 - John Caldwell Calhoun (Sec. of War, Democratic-Republican-SC) 1825-1832 (1 full term, resigned) Pres: J. Q. Adams, Jackson

Look at this guy, he's fucking crazy. An insane nationalist and born southerner, he sided with Jackson over Adams in the controversy surrounding the Election of 1824. He spent four years subverting his own president, then ran with Jackson in 1828. A staunch states' rights guy, he ended up opposing Jackson too in the Nullification Crisis. When he found out he was going to be replaced on the ticket in 1832, he resigned to take an open Senate seat, leaving the office open until the election. It's worth mentioning that as a states' rights Southerner, he was amazingly pro-slavery. I dare say that makes him worse than a drunk.

Coming Up - We've just met the first VP to resign the office. Who was the second?

Later - The cream of the crop and the bottom of the barrel.

(Click here to view the whole list so far)

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