This Is a Blog: List of Thrones: One Fish, Two Fish, Blackfish, True Tris

Wednesday, September 21, 2022

List of Thrones: One Fish, Two Fish, Blackfish, True Tris

After finishing a Game of Thrones re-watch and starting a books re-read, I decided to rank the top 100 characters in the show and books. My opinions are based on an amorphous mix of show and book stuff, even when they contradict. I don’t have something interesting to say about all 100, so they’ll be listed without comment.
100-81 | 80-61 | 60-41 | 40-21 | 20-11 | 10-1

80) Melisandre of Asshai
79) Tristifer Botley

Poor guy. All he wants in this world is to love a woman who will never, ever love him back. He’s just a sweet, devoted bookworm. And I love the name Tristifer
78) Osha
77) Gerris Drinkwater

To truly understand this put upon seafarer, you’ll have to wait until I explain the greatness that is Quentyn Martell. It was a good choice not to include this story in the show, but you show watchers are severely missing out on maybe the best four chapters in the whole series. That’s right, Gerris and Quentyn made an impact on me in only four chapters.
76) Roose Bolton
75) Walder Frey

What a well-drawn villain. The man has no scruples and all the power. We know everything we need to know about him before we even meet him. He’s a cunning coward, with an ego as monstrously huge as it is fragile AF. In a world where we are told over and over again never to underestimate a person’s capacity for self-serving evil, he still manages to stun us with an act of unfathomable heinousness.
74) Meera Reed
73) Euron Greyjoy

I feel like he could get higher on the list as more books come out. He was cartoonish on the show, but the potential is there. His entrance into the Kingsmoot is epic. Asha offers the Iron Born everything they could ever want, but Euron sweeps in with a promise he can never deliver on, basically to conquer the world and dominate the Dragon Queen. People will choose dreams over reality any time, a fact that became all too real after the book’s release.
72) Robert “Sweetrobin” Arryn
What a twisted little shit. I can’t decide if I want more or less of him in the books to come. Maybe he’ll find someone else to nurse him.
71) Doran Martell
A fascinating character absolutely destroyed by the show. His overt weakness causes those around him to second guess him, but it turns out he’s covertly trying to win the Big Game out from under everyone. The show just made him weak and killed him. This is another one that could rise as the books go on. We don’t know how he will adapt to one of his many-headed snakes failing, but given his clear cunning, it could have major ramifications.
70) Brynden Tully
69) Viserys Targaryen

What a waste. The fucking coolest name given to the biggest shit. The Beggar King deserved everything he got.
68) Gendry
67) Yoren
66) Loras Tyrell
65) Gilly

Poor Gilly. She’s been through so much, and all she wants is to keep her child alive. The show doesn’t even give her story a resolution. She’s pregnant with Sam’s kid, then Sam becomes a Maester, who isn’t allowed to have children. Is Gilly now a single mother of two?
64) Sansa Stark
I’ve never liked Sansa. I’ve never liked anything about any of her stories. She’s a naive girl who is brutalized for her naivety. The show quickly positions her back in the center of the story, and this redeems her somewhat. I just never quite bought that character growing into what she became. Arya says she’s smart, but nothing really backs that up. And those dude writers putting into her mouth that getting raped and brutalized made her into the woman she is, ick. No. Given how different her journey in the books is, I have hope GRRM will give me reason to rank her higher one day.
63) Jeyne Poole
How is Sansa’s journey in the books different? Well, originally, Sansa brought a friend to King’s Landing. When Arya disappears, the Lannisters dress Jeyne up like Arya and ship her off to Winterfell to marry Ramsay. All that “character development” Sansa endured is actually Jeyne’s story. And this leads to one of the hardest to explain plotlines of the entire series: Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch (who’s actually a Targaryen Prince) sends a Bard (who’s actually King-Beyond-The-Wall) to Bolton stronghold Winterfell (which is actually the Stark stronghold) to save Arya Stark (who’s actually Jeyne Poole) from Ramsay Bolton (who is still actually a bastard because Tommen isn’t the rightful king) with the help of Reek (who’s actually Prince Theon Greyjoy).
62) Podrick Payne
The story arc he got in the show is sweet. He’s just an adorable little dude who wants to please people so badly. Hope he gets something equally good in the books.
61) Jojen Reed
Everything about Bran’s storyline sucks, but at least Jojen gets some kind of otherworldly powers. Creepy kids always pop off the page and screen.

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