I Swear This Makes Sense

There has been so much QB movement this offseason, it's hard to keep track of it all. I gave up on writing about it and just made charts. Some of the movement is easy, like Denver and Seattle swapping quarterbacks. By easy, I mean the movement is easy. No one can explain to me why Drew Lock is a good QB, or what Seattle gains from this trade. Speaking of stupid fucking roster moves, Cleveland went all in on a multi-accused sex offender and just took his word that it was all good. They deserve all the chaos they brought onto themselves. At least Baker Mayfield found a better landing spot. He says he's looking forward to a QB competition, but Darnold couldn't keep his job when the only alternative was an aging Cam Newton. Charlotte is about to be Baker's town.


But then there's this shit. One team lets a guy go then they need another guy, then the guy they get leaves a hole in his old team's roster. Suddenly washed up back ups are contenders to start again. Guys being given a THIRD chance on a new team. Now Mike Glennon, Chicago's one-time best available option doesn't even have a job.


That's just starters and potential starters. No one can hold onto a backup even. At this stage in his career, is Andy Dalton really a better backstop in New Orleans than Trevor Siemian?


Maybe I spoke too soon about who is and isn't a potential starter because Jacoby and Mitch will definitely see some playing time. Neither of these guys, though, is starter caliber. All of this movement, so Pittsburgh can re-build around a proven failure at the position? As a former Patriot, I do hope Jacoby can keep his sinking ship afloat. I saw him in his debut during Brady's suspension, and he impressed me. But his team just made one of the biggest blunders in sports history, and that disaster is falling square on his shoulders.


Speaking of former Patriots backups, I forgot Jarrett Stidham was still on the roster. Congratulations to him for finding a new job. He's a step up from Nathan Peterman, but then again, so is a rubberband on a stick. This all secretly is setting up a Cinderella story where the Colts face the Buccaneers in the Super Bowl, Matt Ryan is facing another humiliation at the hands of Tom Brady, when he's taken out of the game and Nick Foles once again takes down the G.O.A.T. Hope the charts help you like they help me. This shit confusing.